date nights for all, without losing any regularly scheduled activities

[kareina]

Our calendar is kinda full.

Mondays are nyckleharpa--one week at a friend's house doing Swedish folk music, the next at our house doing medieval music.

Tuesdays are choir (but C. doesn't join lord_kjar and I for that, as choir singing isn't her thing, so she is using the time to go to exercise classes at the gym, as she is an extrovert who is getting way more alone time than she needs just now while she is looking for work, and I am working more hours than normal)

Wednesdays have been unscheduled

Thursdays are Frostheim

Fridays we have had a "husmöte" scheduled

Saturdays don't have anything regular scheduled, but they tend to fill up

Sundays are folk dance.

After today's meeting (since we didn't actually manage Friday's "husmöte" last week, since he didn't get home from work till quite late, and then there was no energy left for such things) we took up the topic of finding a balance between quality one-on-one time for each pair in the relationship, and quality time for all three together and quality time alone, and quality time doing stuff with people outside the house. After tossing around ideas, we decided to keep the basic schedule, but add in some specific date times, on a rotating basis. Since he is still craving more time with her than with I (due, in a large part, to having been long distance for so long) we decided that we will alternate Wednesdays, one week they have a date night, the next he and I have a date night. On the weeks that they have a Wednesday date we will still have a meeting on Friday, which is really mostly just some quality time curled up on the couch together talking all three of us. On the weeks he and I have a date on Wednesday they will have a date on Friday. That gives them specific date time every week, and he and I every other week, but also gives me an every week opportunity to spend time with O., if he wants it (without obliging him to do so if he doesn't).

In the short term she and I will do our date time together during one afternoon in a week after I am home from work and before he comes home, but once she finds work we will have to adjust accordingly, depending on her work schedule.

Those "date nights" might wind up being time to work together on projects, or time for cuddles, or music, or dance, or whatever we happen to feel for, but putting them on the calendar increases the odds that we make time for one another and nurturing all of the relationships in the house.

Comments

[learnteach.livejournal.com]

Sounds fun!